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Disclaimer: The characters and world of Harry Potter belong to J.K. Rowling and several large companies. Not making any money off this please don’t sue.

Note: Does not directly contradict what was seen in the epilogue of Deathly Hallows but does directly contradict things revealed by Rowling in interviews.

Pairings: Percy Weasley/Oliver Wood.

Warnings: None really.

The Accidental Voyeur:

George carefully let himself into Percy’s London flat using his mother’s spare key. He knew Percy had given their mum the key as part of his apology for being such a prat. He’d liberated the key just a few hours ago while visiting his mother to once again assure her that he was doing okay. He was tired of everyone treating him with kid gloves so much since Fred’s death. He wanted things to go back to normal as much as possible and he figured this little prank should help accomplish that.

He took a moment to glance around at his brothers flat and wonder exactly how much Percy was getting paid since the flat was much larger than he’d have thought. He shrugged and went to find the loo he needed to add his surprise to Percy’s shampoo as quickly as possible since he didn’t want his mum to miss her spare key.

There was no shower in the one in the hall but once he found Percy’s bedroom he found a rather nice master bath connected. He was reaching for the shower door when he nearly screamed in fright as a large orange cat jumped out from behind the toilet at him hissing before running under the bed.

He cursed at the stupid animal wondering when Percy got a cat as he wasn’t very fond of them at all growing up. He gave up wondering about it and headed into the bathroom to dump a small vial of a potion into Percy’s shampoo. His mother had invited everyone to a dinner at her house tomorrow and he was looking forward to Percy showing up with brilliant blue hair which wouldn’t go away for the next three days.

He smiled to himself wondering if Percy would find out what happened if you tried to use a spell to restore your natural hair color before the time ran out. He was looking forward to seeing Percy with a halo of sparks flying out of his hair at dinner tomorrow. He knew his mum would give him hell about doing this to Percy but it should definitely end everyone treating him with kid gloves.

Suddenly he heard the door opening and almost panicking he cast a hasty disillusionment spell and ducked into a small corner of the room. He couldn’t believe his rotten luck of all days Percy had to pick this one to come home from work early. “Snitch where are you?” He frowned that didn’t sound a bit like Percy in fact it sounded a lot like his old quidditch captain.


He was still trying to decide what in the world was going on when Oliver wood entered the room and kneeled down next to the bed calling to the cat. He watched even more confused when Oliver pulled the large gold cat out and it began to purr. “You know Percy doesn’t like you in this room when we aren’t here,” he told the cat smiling at it fondly.

Percy had never mentioned having a room mate and he wondered if maybe his mistaken Oliver’s room for Percy’s. He wondered if he should reveal himself and warn Oliver not take a shower with that shampoo. He hadn’t noticed another Bedroom but he hadn’t fully explored the flat before he came across this room. He was just about to end the spell when he heard the door open again and his brother’s voice calling out for Oliver. “I’m in the bedroom Perce,” Oliver called loudly.

He had to have misheard right Oliver couldn’t have really just implied there was only one bedroom in the flat. “Your cat has been in the room alone again, hasn’t he?” Percy said walking into the room with a scowl. “I’ve told you to close the door after you leave for morning practice.”

He realized with a sinking feeling he hadn’t misheard Oliver as his former quidditch captain just laughed at Percy’s scowl and leaned in for a quick kiss. “Your just ticked that your mom invited Penelope to that dinner tomorrow in an attempt to get you two back together.”

“Yes,” Percy said with a frown. “I’m just glad Penelope was nice enough to warn me of my mother’s match making attempts.” Percy seemed to scowl even more as he said, “She could have turned my mother down.”

“Penelope likes your mum,” Oliver said with a shrug. “Plus I think part of her is still pissed about how things ended between you two.” George privately wished they’d leave the room to continue this conversation because he didn’t want to know all this about his brother. “Relax Perce you’ll feel better after we go out to dinner tonight.”

“I’m not hungry,” Percy said peevishly. “Besides the reservation isn’t until seven I still don’t know why you asked me to leave work early.” George privately felt like yelling at Oliver about that too.

“I wanted us to work up an appetite before dinner,” Oliver said dropping the cat and shooing it out of the room. George began to silently pray that Oliver didn’t mean what he sounded like he meant. He cursed internally and slammed his eyes shut as Oliver dragged Percy into a kiss. He did not want to see his older brother and Oliver Wood have sex.

He reluctantly opened his eyes after the moaning started. He could have gone his entire life without learning that Percy was very vocal in bed. He did his best to avoid looking at the bed as he slowly and carefully attempted to make his way to the door. He managed to make it out of the door and it took everything he had not to start running. He couldn’t risk them catching him not now he’d never live it down.

It was only later when he was safely back at home after returning his mother’s key and hoping he’d be able to look Percy in the eye tomorrow at dinner without blurting everything out that he remembered the prank potion. He wondered if he could send an owl with a warning when there was an incessant tapping at his window. He turned to see Hermes holding a howler addressed to him. He wished he’d never decided to prank Percy everyone treating him like he was fragile wasn’t really that bad.

The End...

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